Saturday 26 September 2009

support,and health

tHIS PAST WEEK,has been a trial of strength ,patience,and my own perceptions.Thankfully IT is past,at least for the present,and I can start to rebuild my mental health.Over the last few months ,my health has gotten worse ,both physically ,and trust -wise, with others ,along with black moods which have blighted any attempts to help myself.One step forward, two steps back,so no progress so far .I will not be deterred from continuing on my way toward my goals this is a setback ,not an end.The messages I have been sent from so many dear people,and support from friends,I will never forget,it has galvanised my determination,so THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH.Having virually watched helplessly,with my M other dying [as I thought]in front of my eyes,it has been a traumatic time,and my own health has uffered as a result.The bond between myself , and my parent is a powerful one ,which is now even stronger through this time.My trust of others has suffered, because of my perceptions of their words ,actions, and attitudes.Which I am now realising were purely my own misinterpretations.I have not quite learned to be less harsh on myself,which is something i have not yet developed.The learning curve is a steep one,but not unsurmountable,so I will continue to fight this conflict within myself,now knowing that I am not a alone as before.A positive with which to take heart.

4 comments:

  1. Hi David,
    This is a most encouraging read. I fully understand that our perceptions can be blurred by ongoing traumatic events. I am sending positive thoughts to you and your Mother.
    You know you must keep challenging yourself. I have observed, from my perspective, that you have been receiving some positive, caring, compassionate concern. I think this is cause for celebration.
    I hope you consider me some semblance of a positive resource. When I came over to visit you on that Monday, I had to challenge my own anxiety on public transport; just to come and support, indeed to display, that I am here for you.
    Now, please try, as best you can, to continue with this positive momentum. You are not alone and we can all be here for each other.
    In kindness, Gary:-)

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  2. Hi David,
    Please overlook my coming and going on here. A couple of issues needed me to either be present (with it), or distracted (from it). This happens when I allow a small dose of the past to cloud my present. After all, even with the wonderful resources I have, it is still an inside job.

    I am so happy that your Mother is better. For me that was always a good thing, as I was very close to my Mom. I could 'feel' your pain, but I didn't want to David. I ran.

    You have many more resources that maybe you can 'see' at the moment. Time will give you exactly what you need. I'm positive about that. Just as time allowed me to get to know that you exist... I am grateful. My heartfelt thanks.

    In respect to you, always,
    Dixie

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  3. Thanks,Gary,I am nothing ,if not hardened to these black times,even if they test my mettle to ,and beyond their limits.You have been a great help ,just your prescence here was a great healer.I know you are right ,this is a constant fight ,one I will not relent ,or ever stop learning from.Yours in PEACE .Dave.s

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  4. Hello,Dixie,I can understand your dilemma,my past ,too ,has a tendency to come back to plague me ,when I least expect it.You are here now ,and I am grateful that you appreciate that time can help.You are ever the gentle spirit,and your prescence is always of great worth to me .GOOD KARMA.PEACE.Dave.s

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