have a heart

The real problem I have ,here and ,now,is sleep,none.It exacerbates the irritation,pain,and depression in me ,and I do not seem to break the vicious circle.Over the last year ,I have gone from co-ordinator/volunteer worker for a charity I trusted,to, now ,being treated as a stupid nothing ,all the time I contributed to this cause ,it built my self-worth,value ,and gave me purpose.For the only time in my life,I felt that I belonged ,how wrong I was.Once again ,there are only empty promises .in the distant future. How cold this place can be ,the people pass by ,barely noticing I am there,not feeling the empty hole ,inside me .This piece,is just another fragment of the tortured empty soul.that once laughed,as a boy ,dreamed of being so many things,all fallen by the wayside,still more to come.I know,some of this is dark,yes,my thoughts are dark too.The light must soon be here,it is only a matter of time.I n the shadows ,there is a flicker of hope,always hope,it springs eternal?Where has everyones faith in me gone,do I not breathe ,live ,laugh ,cry,need and seek warmth,from this sterile world.No different than anyone else,I crave company ,affection,love,is this wrong?I believe not,I know it is human,sensitive,and decent ,to be me,it is also painful ,alone,silly,pointless,and so much more.If you see me ,give me a smile ,and you will get one,know me a call,it would warm this no-ones heart.