so what happens now?

This ,is one of my darker moments[familiar story?]having been put on medication,I now feel worse,a short term fix ,was how it was put,no such thing.It would seem ,no matter which approach I take,it has been misread ,or gone wrong,a no-win situation.Increasingly,I am becoming more frustrated,angry,and despairing,and I cannot seem to get through to anyone,how sick I am,I have run out of options ,when these moods draw a veil over my rationale.It is an empty,hopeless pain,compounded by my inability to communicate it.My prison is closing in on me ,and I feel the cold slamming of the door behind me.The progress I had made,has been reversed,I said that I could never revert to my former self,but I cannot seem to halt the process.People have said ,that it will change soon,not in my experience,the slightest word will destroy me inside,its all too close to me to see.I have seen others make good pogress,Iam the forgotten one,still here,still stagnant ,knowing that I am better than this.Not much use,if only I believe it,and even that is coming into question.I am beginning to think that this journey has been me,watching everyone else move on.Why else would I be up at 3am.I have to make it clear ,that these are my personal issues,I just wish I could be more positive,but i must remain true to myself.