small steps

Glad to be here,but i will try not to rush ,be myself,"small steps".Stay positive , i keep repeating[it might work]be consistent and stay open to situations.Thats a difficult thing,not wanting to push forward and progress,takes the edge off positivity.I AM FOREVER looking at past situations ,which ended in me hurt, because of my trust.See things in their true light ,not just from my angle.look at all sides.Do i chance trusting ,and risk getting indifference?too much ,pathways getting crossed in my mind,lack of focus.I cant say,nobody has all the answers ,that would be too easy.This weekend has been something of an epiphany,time will show whether good ,or bad.I am surprised by my support ,and resources,yet still cannot enjoy them,does history always repeat itself?There is no answer ,only questions from me ,am i deserving of friendship,happiness,contentment?I ,it can be i know others struggle with these issues,you are not alone,many people get hurt ,it can be turned around,persistence,and faith ,but some kind of self belief does,sometimes help.As you can tell, I am still holding my breath,waiting for the fall,but i will keep believing my future will open up,and the real me ,will emerge,the me I have always known exists,that open ,loving,serene,passionate,me nobody knows.