Keep the faith

Ifind myself ,getting more and more impatient these days,getting wound up,and for what?Someone makes an abusive comment,a dirty look,or ignores my feelings /needs.All my choices ,i can let it go ,or allow it to get under my skin.The obvious answer ,is to ignore it , and remain positive[easy to say,not from here it isnt]Of course, all our reactions ,attitudes, and moods can be choices,if the principles allow.Sowhy am i falling into this trap?Learned behaviour,bad habits,the wrong coping mechanisms ,i should know better now,am i being too hard on myself?Given the right frame of mind,this process can be halted,for me ,this is SELF BELIEF/CONFIDENCE.The starting point of which ,is choosing the people who are nurturing, understanding , and empathetic.Breaking down the walls of isolation,self loathing,and learning to love myself ,and know that i am a valuable ,good natured ,enthusiastic,and deeply compassionte man ,worth knowing .Now i need to seek out people who feel the same way about myself ,that i am beginning to, thats the difficult part,but i do keep putting myself out there ,doing the best i can ,it can be done.Just the act of writing this ,has lifted me, i can be transparent,i have nothing to hide ,i am hoping my total lack of trust ,will lessen[a contradiction, i know ]Isincerely hope this makes sense to someone,it needed to be said,just to clear my mind.there is always Hope,keep thee faith,you are worth it.